Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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