I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize