We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
