She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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