i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
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