I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
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P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize