Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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