I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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