i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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