This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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