its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize