Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
