my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
