I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
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So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
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you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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