Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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