I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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