you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize