I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
