Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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