I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
