i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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