Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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