That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
