I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
