Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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