You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
