you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
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Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
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I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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