We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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