I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
