Someone shit on the floor
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
