I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Alive.
So much puke
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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