worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
