The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
