Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
