If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
