i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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