We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
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