You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
