Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
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