It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
