I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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