There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
This baby is an asshole
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Randomize
