Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
is that a dick in a sweater?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Randomize