His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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