life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
