May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize