There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
