told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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