I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Randomize