He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Randomize