dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
