Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize